Constitution of Old

Who needs the Constitution any more. It's an old, out-dated piece of paper that only history classes are concerned with. We don't need any of those silly Articles or Amendments. Why, because We the People of the United States, in order to form a more safe union, do as we are told. At least that's what the TSA (Transportation Security Administration) is banking on.

Recently, it's come to the public's attention that airport security has gone off the deep end. There are now two options (so accommodating of them) for those of you traveling via airplane. One-go through a glorified X-ray machine that looks under your clothes and takes pictures of you (they won't get on the internet we swear!). Or, two-get a pat down from a TSA agent that's more uncomfortable than flying in the cargo section of your plane (private VIP room available if you talk to the right people!) Yes, the government's really missed the mark on this one. Whatever happened to those archaic rules about right to privacy or illegal search and seizure?

In any event, we are headed for a country that assumes its citizens guilty, until proven innocent. So, I can do nothing but commend those brave few who have done what they can to stand up against The Man. Now don't get too crazy, we Americans can't actually let go of our speedy travel; there are no train rides in the futures of many people. Instead we just start stripping. That's right, an outbreak of bathing suit wearers presenting themselves for the pat-down have popped up all over the country. You want to get all up in the American people's business, government?--well have at it; let's make those agents just as uncomfortable as us, and let them see what a violation this is.

I'll leave you begging you to remember the Constitution of Old, written out from those first Americans who felt tyranny so that the monarch could be kept a safe world power, and who spoke out vehemently against it. This is what we are born from, what our country has been called to do as, more than anything else, leaders of the Free world, not the safe one.

The Constitution of the United States Amendment IV (12/15/1791): "The right of the people to be secure in their persons [...] against unreasonable searches and seizures, shall not be violated"

And if that's not good enough for anyone out there to stand up for what is theirs let us remember one document more--

The Declaration of Independence (7/4/1775): "But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their [the people's] right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government"

All I have left to say is if I must, I will throw off my clothes, to throw off such Government, and join one more Speedo to the cause of American Freedom.